.. Life ..

I will not make the same mistakes that you did. I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery. I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard. I’ve learned the hard way, to never let it get that far! Because of you, I never stray too far from the sidewalk. Because of you, I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt. Because of you, I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me. Because of you, I am afraid. I lose my way and it’s not too long before you point it out. I cannot cry because I know that’s weakness in your eyes. I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh everyday of my life. My heart can’t possibly break, when it wasn’t even whole to start with. I watched you die. I heard you cry every night in your sleep. I was so young. You should have known better than to lean on me. You never thought of anyone else, you just saw your pain. And now I cry in the middle of the night, for the same damn thing. I try my hardest just to forget everything. Because of you, I don’t know how to let anyone else in. Because of you, I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty. Because of you, I am afraid.